Uh Oh!

It's so weird, I'm already back in Manila but it feels like I'm not really here. It's like I'm observing things from behind a glass wall and even if I am here, I shouldn't really get to much into things as I have to leave everything in a month's time.... and that's the hard part.

This is it. The step towards the change. The moment you realize something is happening and you can't put your finger on it. Things are moving in small increments and one of these days.... I think it will hit me hard, so friends.... I will definitely call or run or basta... you get the picture.

Take for example when I went with sis and bro-in-law to the New Parents Orientation in Ex. I went, was very happy to see my friends and mentors, but after all that, I honestly felt sad that I wasn't a part of it anymore. It felt closer to regret as CIS is not exactly home yet, as it is a bigger pond, more fish to swim with, and I don't even know if it will ever feel like home. *sigh* But I know, I have to go through this, I've already had the chance to work in what I think for me is my "ideal" happy work place. It's time to explore, see what's out there and go outside the safety of my comfort zone. It's the only way I'll grow right? Mama B asked me a question which upto now is running through my head.... "are you in love with the school yet?". And my answer was, a pause. "I could learn to, I guess" was my answer. With Ex, at the very start, my answer was "Yes!".

What did I get myself into!?